Slip N Slides are now ruined forever.

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Tonight I threw my children into the tub like usual. Once the kids were clean I wrapped my toddler in a towel, toga style, and took the baby to the bedroom to be diapered and pajamaed. (shut up it’s a word.)

When I walked back into the kitchen, a terrible scene unfurled before me. My toddler, Phoebe, had shed her towel toga. She had peed onto the kitchen floor. She was now playing slid n slide across my kitchen floor in her own pee.

I’m going to type that again here for emphasis.

My daughter was slip n sliding across my kitchen floor in a puddle of pee.

A SLID N SLIDE MADE OF PEE IN MY KITCHEN.

That I now had to clean up.

First I had to capture the tinkle-soaked naked pixie as she pranced, giggling, around my house. All I had to do was follow the foot prints made of pee and she was easy enough to locate. I also had to herd the baby away from the giant lake that my floor had become.

I’d like to think of this as a cautionary tale for anyone who wants to have children. You think you can anticipate everything. And then your precious princess luges penguin-style through a urine puddle.

Ah. Well. I planned on spending my Saturday night mopping the floor anyhow.

One thought on “Slip N Slides are now ruined forever.

  1. It’s simultaneously the best and worst thing that has ever happened. Best for us because the story is incredible. Worst for you because you were responsible for cleaning it up. I think Phoebe is going to do big things in her life 😉

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